I knew that my futile obsession with Amy probably wasn’t healthy and I needed to put some distance between us. My mom and her latest boyfriend were ...n another drinking binge that day and hadn’t even made it to the ceremony. No big surprise there. I didn’t bother to say goodbye when I packed my meager belongings into my beat-up Buick and headed west. The first thing I did when I arrived on the coast was to seek out contacts in the shady underworld. The kind of crowds my mom hung out with had. I finally spoke “what are you doing?” my voice was shaky there was no hiding it.“Just relax, feels good doesnt it? Ill show you something your lil Lisa probly doesnt even know, I figure you make me feel good, the least I can do is return the favor..right?”I didnt answer, he started rubbing all over again and slowly worked his way back to it,this time he pressed , I felt one finger slowly enter me , he stopped as I clinched.“easy..just relax” he said, like I could with my arm pinned, it wasnt. It would have been better than the mental anguish of being rescued by your hero boyfriend.''At your service.' I bowed. 'No thanks required of course.''Yeah, yeah.' She grunted, staring into her cheerios in an uncharacteristically contemplative mood.'Ryan and I were thinking we might play football.' I said casually.Stella frowned, 'Really?''Yeah, we have nothing better to do and we figured we could become those guys that tackle people. And smash on some of the douche bags here.'Stella rolled her. A mutual Love that was ungrounded by society and the people around them. One that opened his eyes and made him feel worth. After years of being beaten with words, guilt and suffocated by control, he lost that worth. It danced in the distance never getting closer but yet never going further away. A word that filled his eyes with desire. With a passion to live. A reason to love. God gave him a reason. A reason to be a better man. There was now a sense of purpose and a realization that there is.
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