It took me an hour to prepare myself to call her. Mum had beeninjured in an accident a long time ago and had lost her rightleg below the knee, but she...was a very strong woman who hadraised both Edward and me on her own. How do I tell her that herfavourite son was gone, probably dead? My fingers lingered onthe telephone, thinking it wasn't fair that I had to make thiscall. I stared at myself in the mirror, brushed my long hairfrom my face and tried to see a strong resemblance betweenEdward and. Her laughter angered me. Nicole apologized but I couldn't hide my disdain, she touched a nerve with her light hearted attitude towards my efforts to be monogamous."I'm sorry Richard it's just that I was so sure you were having an affair it was easy to cheat, after all what am I supposed to think, you weren't doing me so I just assumed... How can I make it up to you would you like some alone time with that little red head that left you in such a lusty fix last night?" No, I want to take you out. Take it as a complement.”“I said I don’t want to talk about it.”“That’s not it, is it?”“Not exactly.” It must have been the beer, as suddenly it all just came flooding out of him. He told me that he got a blow-job at the adult book store from his male friend while watching a sex video of a man and woman fucking, and that he enjoyed it. “So now you think you might be a fag? That’s nuts.” “Why? How the hell can anyone tell? How the hell would you know? Shit, I don’t even know.”I laughed. “I. ”I wasn’t sure how to respond, and my silence seemed to make Maggie speak some more.“I could never have with Simon what we have. I know what I’ve done has risked our relationship, but last night when I came downstairs with Simon, you didn’t seem too upset. You seemed excited.”I thought about where Maggie was taking this. I tried to explain a little.“I guess I do find it exciting seeing some of the changes in you. It’s brought out aspects of you which I do find exciting, in ways I never.
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