Es gab so viel nachzudenken,ich wusste ?berhaupt nicht, wo ich anfangen sollte. Sollte ich ?berhaupt die Pubert?t hinausz?gern? Doch, diese Frage lie?...ich leicht beantworten: Ich brauchte mehr Zeit. Und mit der Pubert?twurden Fakten geschaffen, die nicht mehr reversibel waren, so vielwusste ich. Also gab es keine Wahl.Ich ging zum Telefon und machte einen Termin aus. In einer Woche, hie?es, und das war angeblich besonders schnell.Ich zog mich aus und betrachtete die kleinen Schwellungen auf. Beth noticed that Jack had strolled in late and was gazing around taking in the view. Suddenly his eyes stopped dead on her. He was literally staring at her and a broad grin spread across his face. He started walking directly towards her. Tom was back in the town home in his room doing god knows what on the computer. She was alone and a little fearful for some reason. She felt urges coming over her but she had never strayed in ten years of marriage. Jack came closer and closer and stood firmly. She said she was starting a new job soon and was going to back away from being a prostitute, but that she was going to keep a few of her best clients. We arranged for the next time we would fuck. I got up, dressed and left.For the next few days my wife and I were so busy we did not fuck anyone else let alone each other. I was so horny by the time the day came I was to go see LaDonna again I could hardly wait. I called LaDonna and told her I was on my way and am really horny. She said she will. Then I realized I didn’t feel guilty any more. I’d paid for her death with the life I’d built in its wake. The money meant so little now with most everything paid for by the grant, that I could only use very small amounts. I’d lost the girl I grew up loving, lost my best friend, lost my sister, lost my mother, lost Collie who’d walked away from me in disgust even though she couldn’t function independently and lost Tabby who had dragged the worst of my darkness out into the light of day and had.
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